Mental Health Archives | Partnership for Growth

Hello Christmas – we meet again

I must admit I’m one of those people who actually like Christmas – yes the commercialism of it all irks me as does the obscene amount of spending for just one day – always leaves me feeling guilty. Yet still i indulge.

What I like most is the idea of being ‘forced’ to ‘stop’ down tools and just be still reflecting on the outgoing year or decade which is a big deal.

I am also aware that this time of year can be the loneliest for individuals who have no one thinking about them or to spend time with. It can also be fraught with navigating difficult family relationships particularly if you’ve ‘successfully’ avoided them all year.

So what does this time of year mean to you? How can you make the holiday season more enjoyable and meaningful? Here are 6 suggestions!

1) The gift of giving doesn’t have to be an expensive foray – the giving of your time whether it’s a phone call, (yes i said it a phone call) or popping around to see someone you’ve been meaning to. Or paying attention to a person you care about emotionally.

As you know time is finite you cannot ‘purchase’ more than 24hrs but you can give some of it away to someone in need.

2) Consider inviting someone to share an experience with you, something completely out of their comfort zone e.g helping out in a community kitchen or garden, spending time walking with a group of people that you would not consider ‘their type’. With the hope that they might enjoy it and make it thing to do regularly.

3) Hold a fee paying event at your home and invite a musician or a student artist to perform and donate funds to a charity suggested by your group of friends or neighbours.

4) Have a ‘cook up’ where everyone helps using what you already have in the kitchen and see what you come up with!

5) Hold a Secret Santa with a minimum budget – family members or friends are allowed to re-gift it, to charity with no offence taken or swap it on the day. Be open about it, show gratitude and pass it forward.

6) Finally do nothing at all. Be thankful that you live to see another year and reflect on what 2020 could possibly bring.

All of us here at Partnership for Growth are grateful for your company this year! and we hope that we can inspire you to live an even better 2020 – TAKE CARE BE SAFE see you on the other side!

Celebrate Yourself!

World mental health day is upon us and I’m loving this time of year – the longer evenings as Spring gently descends upon us. I hope you’ve all recovered from the long weekend and the change in daylight saving – I have some tips to share below on keeping that glorious long weekend momentum going, so see you there!

Part of my own well being is learning to say no, not in a mean spirited way but to give myself some space, to reset from constant demands made on my time whether withdrawing from social media for a bit or just having some ‘me’ time pottering at home – I love that word ‘pottering’ definitely of another era.

When my kids were small I was one of those parents as we reached the check out – and all the sweets & lollies lay waiting – my kids would automatically go into ‘Oscar’ performance mode – raging and tantrum-ing as I remained steely faced pushing the trolley pass it with a great big ‘Nope’ written across my face.

It dawned on me back then how easy it was to say ‘no’ to small children – because as the adult you felt completely in control (at least most of the time). Fast forward and I’m finding it increasingly hard to say no to them as young adults particularly when “can i borrow the car, money, house! “ is the only language they seem know.

MENTAL HEALTH TIPs to celebrate yourself this week!

So here goes, this is what I call ‘back to body basics’ – you probably know this already but this is a gentle reminder to be consistent with it (if you can) and you’ll be surprised by the result’s.

If saying ‘no’ is part of your wellness vocabulary this week – go for it! in a kind & compassionate way!

1) Sleep sleep glorious sleep – Good quality sleep is essential for repairing and rejuvenating brain & body. Not enough sleep can lead to you feeling anxious, agitated and even depression.

Find more information on Sleep benefits here.

2) Eat well – in my last blog I linked this to helping the brain with the benefits for the mind and body well researched – remember ‘you are what you eat’ if you saw Maggie Beer on Q&A it even helps with staving off dementia.

3) If you can avoid (excessive) alcohol, smoking and drugs – in excess it depletes the body of essential vitamins such as iron and vitamin B12 which can lower your mood.

4) Exercise & Activity – is essential in maintaining strong mental health – you know when you’ve busted out at the gym, or gone for a good power walk regularly, you naturally feel energised and alert afterwards.

5) Connect with others and try to be sociable – surround yourself with good company – people who’ve got your back! is a must.

6) Giving back by doing thing for others – it can be as little as giving up your seat on the bus – helping someone who needs it up the escalators – to full blown volunteering – do you know, the last time I researched this I read Australia has the highest number of volunteers! how good is that!

7) Lastly ASK for HELP if you are stressed, anxious or just not coping.

Who has your back in your time of need?

On my recent trip overseas I spent some time catching up with family and friends I have known for a long time. I started to ponder the quality of those friendships and what was the ‘glue’ that kept certain friendships going for so long and others not. With certain friends I found myself reverting back to the ‘old girl-friend’ they once knew prior to me leaving home.

Which in reality is really not how I see myself now, I have found those friendships draining and even worse because I engage in it.

Then there were the few friends I could truly be myself with and slip right back in as if I had never left (little treasures I refer to them as). When I first moved to Australia I was naive in not factoring the impact of how lonely I would feel for the familiarity of those treasured friendships in the first few years.

Friendships though are wonderful when it’s good and rich both ways. It also can be draining and not life affirming when it’s not. But guess what? you hang in there ‘duty’ bound by expectations that no longer fit.

Now with family you kind’ve don’t really have a choice… well that’s a box set so I won’t go there for now!

Back on Aussie soil, speaking to a colleague who was suddenly taken ill in the night and had an emergency hospital admission. During her recovery she started to reflect on her ordeal. There were moments of sadness and anger which centered around her ‘close’ friends. Those she expected to rally around didn’t and the ones she wasn’t particularly close to who did.

Which led me to reflect on who really has got my back in my time of need if there is no access to family.

So here are some tips to think about around managing those friendships. (Disclaimer here please, don’t feel you have to go on an immediate friendship culling rampage).

What is your realistic expectation of friends who today are increasingly supplementing your family?
Who would jump out of Facebook and be there for you physically in your time of need?
Out of your numerous social media connections, how many of those are true solid relationships and if so what does that solid relationship look like?

And here’s your challenge for the rest of August:

Tell a potential friend that you care about them and that you think about how they are doing. (And I dare you to NOT do it on social media) 🤔
Push yourself to meet up with a friend/s even if you are busy or tired, you might get some unexpected joy from it.
Be honest, tell your people (you know the ones) that you have nothing to give, because you genuinely have nothing more to give, love them and let them go. (I know this is a tough one)
Social media allows you to cast your friendship net far and wide. Be mindful of those friendships that are there for you all of the time right under your nose. Who you don’t see because you’re busy chasing that ‘mob’ that you think ‘should’ be with.

Remember it’s Ok, we don’t have to be friends with everyone. Cherish those people that have your back, and make sure you have theirs.

It’s Ok, you’ve got another 6 months!

Those of you who are partaking in Dry July, good luck, for those of you not, Merry Christmas in July!

During the last 6 months my wish for you all has generally been to have an awareness of what can get in your way of moving forward towards where you want to be.

So below I have put together a quick revision of that with a gentle reminder that you can push that rock out of the way and keep going. Inhale the future!

In January I talked about a simple review of 2018 – there were some pointy questions to answer which I will include below again as you adapt them to your situation and monitor how you are doing.

In February I gave an outline of one of the therapies I commonly use called ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy) essentially its about “getting out of your mind, into your life”. It teaches skills to handle painful thoughts and feelings effectively. I love it because it’s so simple to implement and makes sense!

March was about Procrastination – killer of joy and action – putting off the inevitable until it’s too late. I added a great article on how to overcome it by doing the hard tasks first (contrary to what you may think works)

In April I shared a personal account of a dear friend who lost her battle with cancer and her struggle to put right all those relationships that were important to her but sadly she didn’t make it. So my take away from her legacy was to have those conversations you want to have. Start again because you can create a new beginning. The cliche that life is too short is kind’ve true.

May covered managing work stress and unhappiness there, figuring out what that means for you. Working with different personality types is not always easy.

June was about managing those winter blues with a reminder to be mindful of loneliness creeping in and how to keep it in check besides relying on Netflix. I also shared another great article on how cold weather is good for the brain. This is your time to shine!!

So to keep on track, for the next 6 months here’s a 3 step task to get you going and more focussed on what that might look like:

List 3 goals you want to achieve between now and the end of the year.
List 3 thoughts that pull you away from achieving those goals.
Reflect on those thoughts, park them temporarily and still continue with your goal plan.

If you need help moving that rock or parking those thoughts, please get in touch.

So you’re unhappy at work – well what are you doing about it?

When I hear that you love your job, it’s really like you have won the lottery! (well maybe not quite the same)

Being around people who love what they do is infectious and joyful. You spend so much of your time there that you kind’ve hope you would at least enjoy it.

But sadly that is simply not the case for you.

How come?

Perhaps because organisations and businesses are full of all sorts and they add to the culture of the place.

What you may not realise is that your co-workers (and that includes managers) bring with them their own stuff and yes some of them may have narcissist tendencies and some may even be bullies. And guess what, it’s all laid out on the shop floor.

If it’s not that?

Maybe you feel that the job you have strived for months or years of study for, is not cracked up to what you think it is.

What tends to happen then is that you feel stuck, trapped or if your in a ‘golden handcuff’ situation, worse.

So what are your symptoms?

Any opportunity to take days off, you take it.
You find yourself talking more about how awful work is and it starts to consume the best part of your conversations with friends or partner.
You may even experience anxiety at the thought of going into the office.
Your mood changes you become snappy, withdrawn from colleagues or workplace gatherings and this carries over at home.

I could go on – but I think you get the point.

So here’s what you can do to turn this around.

Like the early stages of a romance you were enthusiastic once. You were drawn to something at work, think back to what it was. What made you apply to join the business in the first place?
Reflect on what has changed, is it you? new management? a restructure?
What adjustments that you need to make that hasn’t crossed your mind?
What are the little ‘golden nuggets’ lurking under the laptop? is it a regular good laugh with a colleague who has perhaps left? the gym membership that you found as a great perk, or the opportunities to go on training courses?

If all else fails you actually have the mindset to shift that you just haven’t tapped into it yet. But you got this job didn’t you? and you set the mindset to achieve it?

You deserve to love what you do. Time to dig deeper and work on it.

New Beginnings

I was having a conversation with a colleague the other day and we began talking about the meaning of Easter besides the obvious religious context.

Did you know…

The symbol of the ‘easter egg’ represents the birth of new life – new beginnings, starting again, and rejuvenation. In parts of the world the 1st of April represents the first day of Spring the beginnings of new growth.

This week I farewelled a dear friend who lost her fight with cancer. New beginnings have never been more poignant and meaningful as I reflected on my own life and hers. What she had achieved and her legacy. Her stoic quest for putting right those difficult relationships before she passed was important to her – but sadly she ran out of time.

So this is the time, Easter is upon us, the opportunity to renew, start again and clean our emotional house awaits. Don’t miss this chance.

Easter Gift: For those of you who wish to join me in this new beginnings work. I am offering 2 FREE mindset coaching mini support sessions over the next 2 weeks. Simply call my practice on 02 9095 8607 and request New Beginning Coaching. My wonderful team will book you in. If not for you perhaps you have someone else in mind, please share this offer with a friend, colleague or family member who might welcome this Easter gift.

Happy Hopeful EASTER!

Audrey Morrison-Greet – Partnership for Growth

Counselling support can make a difference

Jane suffers from a form of social anxiety. Any activity that requires her to show up in a social capacity she becomes overwhelmed. In the pass her anxiety has prevented her from keeping a job. She has successfully worked through that with counselling support and is now able to maintain steady employment. In the end Jane decided not to see Mamma Mia that afternoon. She continues to work on her social anxiety with measurable goals and achievable successes.

JAMES

James’s has never experienced the physical manifestations of anxiety to that extend before which caused him a lot of stress. With the right counselling & coaching support he was able to have a difficult conversation with his new manager focusing on his strengths and achievements. As a result he felt listened to which in turn gradually reduced his symptoms.

GEORGE

George felt he was alone in his anxiety and feared that he would be dismissed from the position he had held so fondly for 40 years. He kept this all to himself and felt the only option was to suicide. Prior to George’s ‘mistakes’ he was experiencing headaches but did not tell his family. After counselling support George was encouraged to visit his GP and take a more pro-active approach to his health with the support of his partner. What George learnt was his eyesight was failing him and he couldn’t see details hence the headaches and data entry mistakes he was making. He no longer views suicide as an option and is learning that it’s ok to ask for help and it’s not a human failing.

Anxiety can take many forms, it doesn’t discriminate, it can be an unexpected and it can be triggered by any event that you feel is beyond your control. You don’t have to suffer in silence. Help & support is there.

Mindset Coaching

Have you ever had an idea or a thought of starting your own business, completing a DIY project, converting that shed to a ‘man’ cave or an office. But never get round to doing it? you read the books, you spend some money on an online course, or you google search every night about what other people are doing with their dreams. Whilst you may have been inspired by your search you still remain inactive or you procrastinate does that ring a bell! Successful ‘Ted Talk’ people are there because they probably have had good experience of a coach or being mentored by someone at some point in their lives, to be the people they are on that platform. Not only have they practiced what they preach (we hope) but they have taken action ‘walk the talk’. Your probably thinking what does that mean in reality? Well it means we all need a little help from time to time some of us are better at identifying what that help is and some of us need to work on figuring that out. We may have the ideas or the passion swirling about in our heads or a desire to do something else with our lives. Working with our a professional coach who has your interest at heart and want to see you succeed is a great way to start.

Taking small committed steps to achieving what you want to change is do-able and definitely possible when guided in a ‘gentle’ but firm way – such is the power of professional coaching. You soon start to see tangible evidence of what you can achieve and guess what – the first step towards your desired goals.

Partnership for Growth Group

Category: Mental Health